My Adoption Story
I had an open adoption. I was adopted through the Open Adoption Family and Services in Oregon. My birth mom was from Washington, and at that time so was my birth father. I was adopted at birth but the arrangements were made before I was even born. My birth mom was 17 when she found out she was pregnant and 18 when she had me.
My adoptive mom at my wedding
I struggled with my adoption when I was young because I grew up in a more affluent area. There was no one that looked similar to me, and no one that could relate to what I was going through. All through elementary school, I struggled with my identity. I grew up with people saying I talked and acted too “white” to be a part of the colored community, but I was too “black” to be a part of the white community. Everyone I met that was adopted was much younger than I was and they were adopted internationally.
My adoptive dad and I at my wedding
My adoptive parents gave me a better life, but that didn’t negate the abandonment issues and the trauma that came with my adoption. As I've grown and embarked on my healing journey, my personal adoption narrative has evolved. It's become clear to me that ultimately, the power to shape my story lies solely with myself.
My birth mom and I at my wedding